Amanda has taken over my blog for the day, and has asked me to post the following piece she wrote. She is one of the bravest, strongest and most courageous people I have ever met in my life, and I can not express in words just how lucky I am that I get to call her my wife, every day. Thank you Amanda, for being you, for being so strong, and being here today! We love you. – B, Ku, Pu, Bubba, Roo
Please take a few minutes to read her post while enjoying your green beer.
To most people today is a good excuse to party and drink green beer, but to me, it’s a day to celebrate life and all the fabulous people that helped me get to where I am today. Today has always been known to me as “D-day”. That horrible day back in 2007 when I was told…you will lose your hair, you must have a PIC line, you will need many transfusions, you will have numerous bone marrow biopsys, lose all your muscle, have chemo and radiation treatments, and ultimately “you have ALL”.
Ah the memories….sometimes it feels like yesterday. How could one diagnosis change your life so drastically? Actually not only yours…when your sister quits her job and moves provinces to live and help you, when your loving parents get lost driving home, when your meds cause psychosis and your family has to come to your rescue in another province at a family funeral. Yup…pretty sure this impacted just about everyone who was involved in my life at that time.
After 7 years of finishing my last treatment, I finally feels strong enough to talk about some of these things. So to all the people who may be dealing with something similar, know that’s it’s okay to have days where you wished you could just die, months of being nothing but a “negative nancy”, hate the way you look so much you never want to leave the house…There’s light at the end of those very dark tunnels, and also know it’s okay to lean on all the people around you to get out of the darkness; for some day they will likely depend on you.
Luckily after the most difficult year I have ever lived through, the clouds seemed to have lifted, and i could slowly claw my way back into living a normal life. I finished high school, concurred university, reconnected with my high school sweetheart (and now husband), became closer to my family, and got some clarity on what truly is meaningful in life. It really is true that in some of the most painful and difficult situations, you become a bigger and stronger person. Don’t take any one day for granted, especially if you are feeling well! I would not be nearly as close as i am with my sister, if it wasn’t for leukemia taking over my life for a couple years..nor would I have become an RN, be okay walking out of the house (in my pajamas and toting around our cat) knowing people will judge me, or have adopted my little right handed man- Kona. There is definitely many positives that came from my diagnosis, and many negatives as well…but all in all, I am so thankful to be living today, and for all the amazing people that have been a part of my life over the years.
Today I would like to pay it forward to all the fabulous doctors & nurses from the Cross Cancer Institute and Tom Baker Cancer Centre, family members, and friends who assisted and egged me on through my 2 year journey with ALL. It is because all of you, that I am still here today, and there’s no doubt I could have done it without you.Thank you…and now Its time for me to drink a green beer!!
Cheers and Happy St. Paddy’s Day everyone!! xo.